A Turbulent Heart

Yesterday I had the opportunity to serve on the "Student Panel" for High Point University' Admissions event, Presidential Scholarship Weekend. One young man in the crowd asked me a question that in the past, I had routinely answered without pause. He stated, "What was the toughest for you about the transition from highschool to college?" In the past, I had immediately responded, "not having my family close by", "meeting a new group of friends", or "being in a new environment." Instead, yesterday, I responded differently. And I said something-that at the time- did not make sense to me. I woke up this morning wondering why I said it, and where it even came from.
"You know, I believe the most important aspect of the transition is having a contentment of knowing where you are-and understanding that you will be in this new environment for four years. Know where you are, and thrive in it for four years. "
I think it is very interesting how often the words we speak are the ones that WE need to hear-not our audience. I had never said anything like that before to someone when they asked about college life. I continually create a lack of contentment within me- and continually find myself anxious for the future.

This morning I was reading a chapter in one of my favorite books of the Bible, Isaiah 40. It discusses comfort for God's people, that is guaranteed when we are in the grasp of our Lord. I noticed multiple verses that mention a common theme...

"Make straight the desert a highway for our God" (v. 3)
" Every valley shall be lifted up, and every mountain and hill be made low, and the uneven ground shall become level" (v. 4)
"And the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together" (v. 5)

Isn't it so true that often our hearts feel one of two ways- like we are in the desert-thirsting for something more to quench the overwhelming desire we have within us. Or, we feel as though our hearts are turbulent-filled with mountains and valleys (sometimes within a 24 hour period!) and laden with uneven ground.

Just as roads transform rocky, sandy, shaky desert ground to solid highways, and turbulent hearts become stable and level, our Lord will do a work within us in the same manner.

He is the steadier of our hearts, the One who smooths the terrain, and the One who calms the violent emotions that take place within us every day.  This is how he comforts us! Often, He doesn't comfort us simply by throwing joy at us-maybe he comforts us by the steadying of our hearts, and smoothing  the rocky nature of our emotions.

The mouth of the Lord has spoken to his people, and continues to speak into our hearts every day. 

"Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need." Philippians 4:11-12 

The Lord God Almighty-with strength and power that we cannot fathom takes the time to mold our hearts and steady them. How beautiful is the image of the Lord, that shaped us and formed us, continues to take the time every moment of every day to speak truth to our souls. He does not tire, he does not grow weary, even when his followers do. He does not lose heart when our Hearts lost focus, grow dry or grow turbulent. 

Allow your heart to be steadied by Him. It is His beautiful way of comforting us. 

Contentment is found in the understanding of permanence. Even though we will not be found permanently on this earth, we can stay content where we are because of the over-arching, permanent, steadiness found in Him. 

The Surprise

What makes a surprise special? For me a real surprise is something that you couldn't even begin to guess-nowhere on your radar and nowhere in your day-to-day thoughts.

Why were Christmases when we were young so special? Many would say Santa. I say it was the surprise. Santa wouldn't be glorified in our society's mind unless he brought a surprise! He brings the gift that is unexpected-wrapped in a way that alludes to the gift, but does not completely make it obvious in the child's mind.

Now, what makes Christianity, special?  To answer this, we must look at Jesus. Jesus was special because He was a surprise. He was and is a fulfillment of prophecy, but the manner by which He came to us and for us was a surprise. He was not a surprise gift, but the way in which He was presented was.

Now let us step back and look at this from the "surpriser's" point of view. You plan a surprise party for your friend, and you are so excited. In fact, you maintain more excitement than the one that ends up being surprised. Why? You see the whole picture. You know the work you put in to its organization and orchestration. You know the special gift you purchased for the individual's birthday. You cannot wait to celebrate with them as this is a new turning point in their life.

Imagine our Heavenly Father planning a surprise party for us. He has prepared the perfect gift-His perfect son. He has invited the perfect people-His creation. He understands that not everyone will accept the surprise- yet proceeds with the planning.

Our God understood that the perfect gift would be a surprise to His creation. But once we understand the gift, it all makes sense. It all becomes clear. It all fits together. And, we are filled with joy. We are filled with the joy we experienced when we were six years of age unwrapping a gift we may not have ever anticipated receiving. Yet once it is opened- it all makes sense, and you are so grateful.

Let us return to Christmas morning excitement when we open our bibles and open our hearts. He was a surprise for a reason- for that moment when we GET IT.   When we get it, we repent. When we get it, we look to Him more. When we get it, we are awe-struck. Surprises are more exciting than the expected.

Surprises are not happen-stance or random. Let us remember that tedious planning goes into a surprise, and to not take His surprise for granted. In addition, let us remember that surprises are intentionally crafted for a specific reaction from the surprised. 

Let us return to the humility and joy of a young child on Christmas morning. Let us regain the reverence and the awe when we look at Him.  


John 1:14 And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth
John 1:15-17 (John bore witness about him, and cried out, “This was he of whom I said, ‘He who comes after me ranks before me, because he was before me.’”) And from his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace. For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ.

Act Before You Think

My heart aches this morning. I have recently learned about the theatre shootings in Aurora, CO. The news is filled with correspondants and interviewees questioning, "what has this world come to?!" 


Now, I ask myself, "What has this world become?" How does creation kill creation? What is the motive? What are we doing incorrectly as humans to bring murder and death into this world?


It has just been revealed that the shooting suspect was a 24 year old neuro-science student from the University of Colorado. He was a near graduate of a prestigious program, and now stands behind bars after the killing of twelve innocent human beings. Once again, "how does the world entertain these horrific events?"


James Holmes is a brilliant man who stepped into great, unimaginable sin. Holmes studied the brain, and its intricate functions. He knew the power of the human mind, and all that it could accomplish. 


When we begin to think of the power we have as human beings, it is frightening. We have the ability to direct our lives through free will, end our own lives, or end the lives of God's creation. The only thing we cannot do, is prompt our own lives. We cannot create life. Our God gave His precious children immense, unfathomable responsibility. God knew that when His children were born into a world where sin was present, we would need direction and security in the promise of Heaven. 


James Holmes, I believe, saw his life as a dead end. He became so entranced in the academics of the human mind, will, and capacity that sin was allowed to creep into his psyche. 



<sup>Romans 12:9-13 


9</sup> Love must be genuine. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. ¹⁰ Be devoted to one another in LOVE. Honor one another above yourselves.¹¹ Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. ¹² Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. ¹³ Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.

Our Heavenly Father gave us direction in His word so that we may avoid scary thoughts and sinful actions, as well as grieve the repercussions of sin. The above verse from Romans, is an example of His direction. No matter how confused we become or the depth of our depression, we can never forget our sole purpose on this earth. We are to LOVE one another and LOVE our Savior. We are to engage in genuine love that does not have any motive other than to please our father in Heaven. We are called to never be over come by evil, "but overcome evil with good" (Romans 12:21). 


"But you must return to your God; maintain love and justice, and wait for your God always." Hosea 12:6


Life becomes simple once we study His word. Our mind will fail us, and our mind will make us confused. Our minds are feeble and failing organs in an aging body. Our souls may only be renewed through pursuance of Truth and of Justice and of Mercy. Our souls will be renewed as we follow Jesus, and never allow our minds to fall to the complicated, confusing, and depressing state of our earth. 


I often allow thoughts, criticism, academic research, and ridicule to get in the way of love, hopes, dreams, and prayers. And, I certainly allow negative emotions to block steadfast truth. Why? We are humans, in bondage to flesh, yet eternally set free by a savior. Our emotions will be strapped to a sinful complex as that is our condition. I stand in awe that we are no longer a part of this earth once our human bodies fall away. 


We are allowed to think, dream and imagine, because God owns the concept of an imagination. He gave them to us so that we may do GOOD. So that we may imagine a world where He is ruler and He is physically present.

 I am beginning to see though, before we think, sometimes we must act. This stands in direct contrast to the world's advise of "thinking before acting". Maybe, we should display love, extend mercy, and seek justice, before we allow our mind to wander. It is then that we will think clearly and think under his commandments. It is what He commanded after all, and He is the Great Authority. 

"If you love me, you will obey what I command."  John 14:15


"Love, it will not betray you betray you, dismay, or enslave you, it will set you free. Be more like the man you were made to be. There is a design, an alignment, a cry of my heart to see, the beauty of love as it was made to be."-  Sigh No More, Mumford and Sons. 

#nofilter

Instagram is a tricky thing. The hipster wannabe that I am is in love with the program. Suddenly, I can appear to be a professional photographer, snapping shots of the sunset, or even my meal. All of this off of a simple iPhone camera, and ta-da, there is a fantastic ego-boost awaits. The fact is though, the photo is still an amateur 5 megapixel shot, covered up with filters appearing to be something with depth.

My goodness how I love that word picture in relation to the Christian walk. How easy is it to cover ourselves up with "filters." Are we the hipster Christian, complete with oversized glasses, skinny jeans, and combat boots? I have nothing against this image...frankly, I secretly love it. But a problem arises when we attach ourselves to a trend of the world for any form of security. Do the logos on our shirts allow us to find a "niche"? Does our style place us in a select group of people where we find our identity?

This has been one of the greatest struggles for me attending a university founded under the Christian faith. There is certainly a mission field, yet I am SAFE carrying my bible on campus. I am SAFE attending bible study. I am SAFE putting a bible verse as my status. I feel safe as a Christian. I can place whichever filter on myself and always feel included and secure.

I have been convicted of just how foolish this is. Our savior strongly warns against finding security in this world. John 18:36 states, that Jesus' kingdom is not of this world. If we declare that we believe in the saving power of Jesus, we cannot also live a dual life pleasing to the flesh. You see, two kingdoms cannot reign on earth at once. Jesus' Kingdom is eternal and is pure. The tainted earth cannot exist alongside the purity of our Heavenly Father.

Sometimes, filters do not make anything better, do they? The new trend of hashtagging  "#nofilter" has a sort of cache to it. Now, the original is more beautiful than any manipulation or conforming. Now that is refreshing. We need not gravitate towards a filter of this world. We were made exactly as God designed us, for His purposes, and for His glory.   We cannot place a label on ourselves and manipulate the original for acceptance, security, or popularity.

Why?  First, we were made exactly as we were for a very important reason, exactly as we are. No cosmetic surgery. No fashion sense makes you worthy. And second, gravitating towards the world's filters reveal that we are not happy with God's already perfect plan, or we believe the world has a better design for our lives. And this is where it is scary. The world is steeped in sin and is very ready to place a filter on you. The world does not want an original. The world wants the vulnerable.

We can choose to live imperfectly for a perfect God. Or, we can chose to "appear perfect" for an imperfect world. It is our choice. And, He is the answer.

John 15:19 
If ye were of the world, the world would love his own; but because ye are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hateth you.